Rise & Grind 👑 🙌🏾
“To assume is to limit the mind to one way of viewing, when by nature our perceptions should be infinite.” — Unknown
I feel like a large part of human life is making assumptions. Especially with a lot of us fearing the unknown, naturally our imagination takes over to help us fill in the blanks. And what our minds comes up with to fill in those blanks can cause unnecessary drama/stress. So let’s get back to the 4 agreements will help with this.
The 3rd Agreement in The 4 Agreements encourages us to “Don’t Make Assumptions.” The idea is simple, but its impact on our lives can be profound. As I stated earlier as humans, we have a natural tendency to fill in the blanks of a situation by making assumptions, especially in our relationships and interactions. This agreement calls us to stop making assumptions, especially when we could ask questions instead.
When we assume without clarification, misunderstandings and unnecessary emotional pain are almost inevitable. Often, we end up taking our assumptions personally, creating drama and emotional poison where there needn’t be any. Instead, by seeking clarity and avoiding assumptions, we can approach situations with clearer communication, reducing conflict and strengthening our connections.
High-Level Overview of Previous Agreements:
1st Agreement – Be Impeccable with Your Word. This agreement teaches us to use our words consciously and positively. Words carry power, and by choosing our words with care, we avoid spreading negativity and judgment. This foundation helps us transform our inner dialogue and external communication.
2ndAgreement – Don’t Take Anything Personally. This agreement reminds us that what others do or say usually has more to do with their own beliefs and perceptions than it does with us. Taking things personally feeds into our own ego and insecurities, leading to unnecessary suffering. By detaching ourselves from others’ opinions or judgments, we free ourselves from needing validation or fearing criticism.
How the 3rd Agreement Complements the 1st & 2nd Agreements
The 3rd Agreement builds on the first two. If we are impeccable with our word (1st Agreement) and avoid taking things personally (2nd Agreement), we’re less likely to create assumptions that lead to misunderstandings.
For example, instead of guessing what someone else thinks, we can clarify by asking questions, aligning our communication with honesty and precision. Likewise, by not taking others’ actions personally, we can avoid jumping to conclusions about their motives or feelings. This process leads to more genuine connections and helps to dissolve the patterns that feed into misunderstandings, resentment, and conflicts.
This practice of avoiding assumptions aligns well with maintaining emotional clarity and inner calm. By being impeccable with our word, refraining from taking things personally, and not making assumptions, we form a trio of habits that prevent negative cycles of miscommunication and personal suffering.
5 min visual summary